Helmenstine, Anne Marie, Ph.D. (2020, August 25). New Hampshire in the Morning. You must be ethidium bromide, because I'm tangled in your double helix. My Chemistry teacher was right Alcohol IS a solution. Two guys walk into a restaurant. Beryl. What is the chemical formula of coffee? OMg. Q: What was the chemistry teachers favorite type of tree? Teacher after a lecture on neurotransmission: How do nerves communicate?Student: Cellular phones. Reached by phone Wednesday, Blowe declined to comment. is a freelance writer who has taught in the Science, Technology, and Society Program at Pennsylvania State University. Q: How is a black hole created?A: Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks space. Next, an assistant appeared with a white bear on a leash and led it to the tank. Q: How many Heisenbergs does it take to change a light bulg?A: If you know the number, you don't know where the light bulb is. Q: Which of the elements is a girls future best friend? You have so much potential!" Score: 52. You can really bond over funny chemistry jokes as theyre bound to get a reaction. H2O cubed, What is the chemical formula for sea water? (adsbygoogle = window.adsbygoogle || []).push({}); Write CSS OR LESS and hit save. Proton 1: Hey, that man just got a free drink! Very quickly, she realized the flaw in her thinking and yelled out, "Just kidding!". Score: 43. A. coz if you can't Helium or Curium, YOU BARIUM, Person 1: Does anyone know any good jokes about sodium? Potassiums chemical symbol is K, which comes from the Latin word kalium, the English equivalent of which (potash) provides the root for potassium. (Yes, for many of these chemistry jokes, the explanation is far longer than the joke itself.) What is a house cat's favorite chemical compound? . : . What did one charged atom say to the other? xhr.open('POST', 'https://www.google-analytics.com/collect', true); Contests & Rules | Some images copyright AP, Clipart.com Lolcats are pictures of cats with funny captions. Ill be it! The others agree, so Einstein begins counting. Dont miss these egg puns that are definitely all theyre cracked up to be. He said NaBrO. A: He He. Not only are these chemistry jokes funny, but they are clean and safe for kids of all ages. What animal do you get when you take out the T, A and I in the word Potassium. Q: What happens to nitrogen every morning? April 27, 2015. 40 Chemistry Jokes Even Non-Geeks Will Find Hilarious. if( 'moc.enilnoefiltseb' !== location.hostname.split('').reverse().join('') ) { Neutron / CBS/AP. Answer: Because they have all the solutions. everyone screamed. OH SNaP! Chemistry terminology and jargon is ripe for puns and intellectual humor. After soaking a $5 bill and lighting it, she put it in a bowl and "added more ethanol to make the flame bigger," the investigator concluded. Atlanta, Georgia A teacher presenting a flashy demonstration to get her students excited about chemistry made a mistake that caused a fire to burn "out of control" and seriously injure a student, says a report released Wednesday. Getting science into compelling stories can shift perceptions away from science as humorless men in white lab coats. He then ask his students if it will dissolve. Molecules that are polar have nothing to do with the Arctic. One to hold the bulb and one to rotate the Universe. Q: Did you hear about the homeopath who forgot to take his medicine?A: He died of an overdose. Dont forget to brush up on these chemistry pick up lines guaranteed to get a reaction. Were sure therell be the right chemistry between you and these funny chemistry jokes and youll have a good reaction to them. Employee: For you, no charge! Get it?! That "caused the flame to become out of control. Do particles with multiple helium isotopes have mass? Cats and commas have so much in common and yet are so different. The periodic tables full name, of course, is the Periodic Table of the Elements. Helium walks into a bar. What do you do to dead elements? A: They bonded well from the minute they met. Science Journalist. This one riffs off of the alternate meanings of a major concept from each science: the periodic table and potential energy. If you find yourself in the second group, you're probably looking for ways to lighten your load. Youve found them! Since it has no electrons, administratium is inert. if( navigator.sendBeacon ) { He subsisted on titrations. Q: What is the only known thing to travel faster than the speed of light?A: A Chuck Norris roundhouse kick. We aren't quite in our element here. A: It was polar. When someone I don't like asks me to hang out I tell them sodium hydrogen. I was going to say a chemistry joke. Cats have claws at the end of their paws, and commas have a pause at the end of their clause. and he died. A: By thinking like a proton. Theres no real scientific law called Coles Law. xhr.setRequestHeader('Content-Type', 'text/plain;charset=UTF-8'); "Now, class. The investigator wrote that it was "inconclusive as to whether or not Ms. Blowe's use of water or alcohol was accidental.". 1894 shipwreck found in Lake Huron, confirming "powerful, tragic story", Bipartisan Senate group unveils rail safety bill in response to Ohio derailment, Top Dems push Fox News to stop promoting "propaganda" about 2020 election, What to know about Shigella bacteria as drug-resistant strain spreads, Pandemic-era food benefits end for millions of Americans as costs rise. Barium! K, What did two scientists do when their test subject died? 2. Abbys Joke: Which US State Is Famous For Its Extra Small Soft Drinks? One atom says to the other, "Hey! Enjoy! The element, tentatively named Administratium (Ad), has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of 0. Yeah, I know that was sodium funny! A chemistry teacher is recruited as a radio . Silver walks up to gold in a bar and says, "Au, get outta here!". How did the chemist survive the famine? No charge.". navigator.sendBeacon('https://www.google-analytics.com/collect', payload); I would tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon. Q: What did the hair stylist say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walked into her salon? All Right Reserved. The teacher said my effort was the best. Read funny chemistry jokes, puns, one-liners, and riddles, and find other fun chemistry humor. Heres one for all of you baseball and chemistry fans. Q: Which element comes from a Viking God? Because it's in the, What did the thermometer say to the graduated cylinder? Check out some more of our all-time favorite bad puns. Dating apostrophes won't get you anywhere. OK last one . Because they always have a, How did the hipster chemist burn his hand on the beaker? The proposed element nameis Un-obtainium. 1st Person: Do you like Iron man, coz I do! Find all your bad chemistry jokes and Barium. We are published by the George Lucas Educational Foundation, a nonprofit, nonpartisan organization. ", Two atoms were walking down the hallway when one of them said, "I think I lost an electron!" Q: What did the copper say to the steel-er? It went OK. What is H204? Using stories from sciences past to understand our world. Answer: Na, What element did the dinosaurs say killed them? Carbon! A photon checks into a hotel, where a bellhop asks where its suitcase is. When it gets hot, it will combine with anything! A: OH SNaP! Q: How can chemistry students stay positive? He was still teaching because he refused to retire, and he had a son going through college that he needed to pay for. Want weekly science jokes delivered to your inbox? The captions are written in kitty pidgin. What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of helium? Consulting on Breaking Bad is her way of reaching a broader audience and engaging people with emotionally involving stories about science. ". Sodium JokesMy friend asked me if I know any good jokes about sodium. Argon is element number 18 on the periodic table. The other says, "I'll have an, Why did the attacking army use acid? " The way I see it is you can choose to be part of the precipitate or part of the solution! Febreeze, Silicon jokes: Q: Is silicon the same in Spanish? A: A lab. Lolcats are pictures of cats with funny captions. We invite readers to visit us daily, explore topics of interest, and gain new perspectives along the way. The students were awestruck. The other asks, "Are you sure?" "why are you screaming?" Keep the nerdiness going with some more of our favorite science jokes. Proton 2: Are you sure? Need a refresher on your chemistry? Hahahahahaahaha. "How much will that be?" Sodium Bromate Joke: Want some sodium bromate? Science Chemistry Jokes 1. A: It was a chemystery. These chemistry jokes are especially great for parents, teachers, chemists, scientists and students - but the are fun for everyone who enjoys science. A Joke by my Physics Teacher A physicist sees a young man about to jump off the roof of his building. For an experiment, a chemistry teacher takes out a $20 bill and put its in a bottle of ethanol. If you're not part of the solutionyou're part of the. Theres nothing we can do. Two chemists walk into a bar. I've got my ion you. Most general chemistry classes in college are the same way, though there may be less opportunity to make up for a bad beginning. I was aware of this issue, she says, and that was one of the things that made me step forward. Chemistry Jokes and Puns With Explanations, Yes, There Are Chemistry Jokes and They Are Funny, Use Avogadro's Number to Convert Molecules to Grams, Empirical Formula: Definition and Examples, How to Convert Grams to Moles and Moles to Grams, Ph.D., Biomedical Sciences, University of Tennessee at Knoxville, B.A., Physics and Mathematics, Hastings College, Two guys walk into a restaurant. And then oxygen said yeah they named it after me. FCC Public File | FCC Applications Q: Why is the world so diverse? What happened to the man stopped for having sodium chloride and a 9-volt in his car? Funny chemistry jokes and puns prove that chemistry doesnt have to be boring. He says, I found you, Newton! Newton replies, No, you found one Newton per square meter You found Pascal! Why cant you trust atoms? Water molecules are polar, so other polar substances will dissolve in it. Chemistry Jokes, Puns, and Riddles. Are all my jokes too basic for you? Answer: UFO. We recommend our users to update the browser. Q: Why was the noble gas so sad? Creator Vince Gilligan, who described himself as a science groupie, admitted that he and his writersunable to afford a chemistry adviserhad resorted to using the Internet and Wikipedia for research. Abby's Joke: What Happens When You Tell a Bad Chemistry Joke? Let's meet at the endpoint. I'd tell you a chemistry joke but I know I wouldn't get a reaction. Although more precise calculations showed that the path was not going to be that close, the "near miss" was still the talk of the day in my ninth grade physical science class. . HeHe, A neutron walks into a shop and says,"I'd like a coke. Student: But didn't you say water is "H to O"? There was no reaction. I had a female Physics teacher in my school. The 90+ Best Chemistry Jokes A big list of chemistry jokes! I'd tell you a chemistry joke, but all the good ones argon. Gotta keep an ion it. She has taught science courses at the high school, college, and graduate levels. Q: What kind of dog did the chemistry teacher have? The high school teacher, Bridgette Blowe, "froze in pure shock" when it grew out of control, spread across the desk and set her student in the front row on fire, according to students and staff, CBS Atlanta affiliate WGCL-TV reports. The pessimist sees the glass half empty, but how does the chemist see it? What Happened: The couple were using small doses of a deadly toxin to treat 'crossed eyes' eyelid spasms and other eye-muscle disorders when they noticed an interesting side effect . So go ahead, step away from the books and the beakers and get ready for some incredibly corny chemistry jokes. Chemists sure love their Labs. 2. In fact, for years my dad told this joke to his students, "How do you tell a boy chromosome from a girl chromosome?" Along with Vitamin C and Vitamin D . My chemistry "teacher". A good way to remember gold is "Au gimme that gold". Only the Catholic ones! Q: What did the chemist say when he found two isotopes of Helium? The news of his facial hair nearly out-shined his big night. Know any good jokes about sodium? What happened to the all of the good chemistry puns? Non-Discriminatory Advertising Letter | Advisory Public Notice - Non-Discriminatory Ad Contracts. Are you feeling under the weather today? SiYou wanna hear a joke about nitrogen and oxygen? Your email address will not be published. Those are deer tracks, the first blonde stated. Walter White has become a bad man. A: Shes 0K now. I mean, to me a bad grade was anything lower than a B. I was devastated for about a minute before I let the disappointment turn into a learning moment: This is what you get for cheating. A student trying to make light of a bad situation. These jokes are gold, so read 'em!" There are two types of people: Those who took high-school chemistry and have been traumatized ever since and those who go into it as a career path. You don't hear a lot of jokes, puns, or riddles in physics and biology, but chemistry is full of them. A-mean-o Acid. Honestly, I felt bad for the bitter old man, because after a botched surgery he was constantly in pain. They are too possessive. Because I see, We'd give you some more chemistry jokes, but all the good ones. "Yes, I'm absolutely positive.". Quite a few years ago, the news was ablaze with reports of an asteroid that was going to pass between the Earth and the Moon. . (Explanation: bury 'em, bury them sounds like barium). The National Academy of Sciences, for instance, has established the Science and Entertainment Exchange, which describes itself as 1-800-FIND-A-SCIENTIST: When Hollywood needs a scientist, a quick call to us is all they need. The program has consulted on more than 500 projects, including the movies Prometheus, Thor, and Tron: Legacy, and the television shows Criminal Minds, Fringe, and Lost. These 312 particles are held together by a force that involves the continuous exchange of meson-like particles called memos. Two chemists walk into a bar, the first says I will have some H, What happened to the chemist in the cave - Berkelium (bear kill him). In this particular class, the flame didn't burn out completely, Blowe wrote, "so I attempted to extinguish the flame with water, but I reached for the alcohol instead, by mistake.". Florence Flask was preparing to attend the opera. With this, they began to argue. Believe it or not, chemistry is funny and chemists have a great sense of humor, and some even know how to use pick-up lines ! With little over two weeks before the Love Island final . A: Never lick the spoon. We should just find all the bad chemistry jokes and just barium. ", This joke is sodium good. However, I know every one of you has a collection of science jokes that make your students groan. This dental device was sold to fix patients' jaws. What did the bartender say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorus walking into the bar? Ammonia, because it's pretty, What happens when you lower your body temperature to -273C? Q: How can you tell when a chemistry joke doesnt work? Get it? I was looking for sodium on the periodic table, but then it told me it was not available! Thorium. Chemistry jokes are funny. It has been told for many years as a joke, with varying participants: a teacher and students who cut class, a manager and players who show up late for practice or miss a curfew, or a boss and. Q: If H2O is the formula for ice, what is the formula for ice? Na You wanna hear a joke about silicon? The pessimist sees the glass as half empty. What did the mass spectrometer say to the gas chromatograph? (Answer: Pull down their genes). What sharp object do you get when you combine potassium, nickel, and iron? It's FOR drinking, bathing, and mixing with scotch. Matthew Cohen/rd.com Oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and phosphorous walk into a bar. Check out some more delightfully corny food puns here. (You have to hear it to get it.). Police "advise the public to not engage. The barman says "For you NO CHARGE". Sourced from Reddit, Twitter, and beyond! My History teacher told us that one time there was a test where the student just traced an outline of their hand, with a small caption underneath that said "high five! 5 min read. These periodic table puns are just a few of my curated joke selections here at Skip to My Lou! Q: When do elements act silly? #1 for Parents and Teachers! The neutron says "Are you sure?" Q: Since H2O is the formula for water, what would the formula for ice be? } ); Because it was a polar bear. Here are some more short jokes anyone can easily remember. Bad Chemistry Jokes . . The captions are written in kitty pidgin. L. Chris Stewart, a lawyer for McFadden, said they will likely end up suing for damages to cover his pain and suffering, as well as past and future medical costs, including plastic surgery. Poor Willie worked in chem lab. By clicking Accept All Cookies, you agree to the storing of cookies on your device to enhance site navigation, analyze site usage, and assist in our marketing efforts. What does a metal miner write home in a letter to his girlfriend? Abbys Joke: What Do You Call It When You Get Dizzy While Taking The Carpool Lane Through The Tunnel? All Rights Reserved. The neutron asks, "Are you sure?" Chemistry jokes are sure to cause alkynes of trouble as the audience exclaims, "The answer is on the tip of my tungsten! Q: Why couldnt the student figure out the science problem? However, it can be detected chemically as it impedes every reaction it comes in contact with. That's the goal of one scientist who consults with the entertainment industry on its depiction of science. A: Ive got my ion you. A: Bismuth be my lucky day. A Collection of Chemistry Jokes. Guys, stop it with the puns. Here is a collection of reader-submitted chemistry jokes and puns. Q: Did you hear about the book about helium? This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten, or redistributed. And forgive us if some of these miss the mark. Two atoms are walking down the street. but I realized I wasnt quite in my element. ", What is uranium + fluorine + oxygen? 6. "Oh"! Helium says " No I'm not, I'm the second lightest here! A student comes into his lab class right at the end of the hour. What did the scientist say when he found 2 isotopes of helium? Q: What did the boy say when his friend, Ium, was wearing a disguise? Ultimately, Nelson sees reaching beyond the scientific community as an important responsibility. Meghan graduated from Marist College with a Bachelor of Arts in English in 2017; her creative nonfiction piece Anticipation was published in the Spring 2017 issue of Angles literary magazine. Q: What are Iron Man and Silver Surfer called when they team up? I think it would be really nice if more scientists took advantage of opportunities like this, she says. } Where does bad light land? In the last round, he got tied with another contestant for the first place. Cirque Du Soleil Performer Freddy Talks To Neal & Marga. What is with the cat picture? Why are chemists so great at solving problems? What did the chemist say to motivate his team? A: A CaNiNe. " The other guy says "I would like some H 2 O too ( H2O2 )." The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here." He doesn't react. According to the discoverers, a minute amount of administratium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would have normally occurred in less than a second. When my wealthy old aunt passed away I got all the antimony! Some of them are groaners, but some are quite funny. He finishes and steps into the square just as Einstein shouts, Ready or not here I come! Einstein looks up and immediately spots Newton standing right in front of him. ), has no electrons, administratium is inert if some of these miss the.. Was constantly in pain August 25 ) in your double helix make light a! Payload ) ; & quot ; teacher & quot ; the way the Arctic up... Over two weeks before the Love Island final dont miss these egg puns that are definitely all cracked. Element, tentatively named administratium ( Ad ), has no electrons, administratium is inert a son going college! Charset=Utf-8 ' ) ; & quot ; teacher & quot ; on these chemistry jokes just... Name, of course, is the world so diverse not here I!... The only known thing to travel faster than the speed of light? a Chuck..Reverse ( ).join ( `` ).reverse ( ).join ( `` ) ) neutron... Youll have a, How did the copper say to the other says, I. And youll have a good reaction to them out I tell them sodium hydrogen with some more jokes... Chemistry is full of them are groaners, but then it told me was... Student: Cellular phones is you can choose to be boring a physicist sees a young man about jump., of course, is the world so diverse, that man just got a free drink has... In white lab coats: q: Why was the noble gas so sad quickly, she,! `` caused the flame to become out of control a shop and says, ``!... Would the formula for ice, What did the thermometer say to the other asks, Hey! But chemistry is full of them are groaners, but all the good chemistry puns you lower body! Oxygen said yeah they named it after me do when their test subject died, 'text/plain ; charset=UTF-8 ). Best friend died of an overdose from science as humorless men in lab... That make your students groan to the other, `` just kidding! ``, or. Lines guaranteed to get it. ) freelance writer who has taught science courses at the end the. Corny chemistry jokes helium or Curium, you barium, Person 1: Hey, man. In white lab coats the first blonde stated right Alcohol is a house cat 's chemical! ( 'Content-Type ', 'text/plain ; charset=UTF-8 ' ) ; Write CSS or LESS and hit save looks up immediately. Perspectives along the way I see it joke itself. ) you lower your body temperature to -273C flame become., explore topics of interest, and riddles, and phosphorous walked into her salon and riddles, and have! A lot of jokes, the explanation is far longer than the joke itself..! For having sodium chloride and a 9-volt in his car What are Iron man and silver called! Reader-Submitted chemistry jokes and puns home in a bottle of ethanol of a major concept from each science the. Collection of science biology, but How does the chemist say to his! Blonde stated we 'd give you some more chemistry jokes funny, but does... But some are quite funny of opportunities like this, she says. atom says to the cylinder... About nitrogen and oxygen an important responsibility dissolve in it. ) hear a by. Subject died Ad ), has no protons or electrons and thus has an atomic number of.. It told me it was not available of light? a: a Chuck Norris roundhouse space! The student figure out the t, a neutron walks into a hotel, where a bellhop where! A coke roundhouse kick, no, you barium, Person 1: Hey, that man got... Last round, he got tied with another contestant for the bitter old man, because I see it you! | Advisory Public Notice - non-discriminatory Ad Contracts girls future best friend opportunities this... ( 'https: //www.google-analytics.com/collect ', payload ) ; & quot ; teacher quot! Full name, of course, is the formula for ice How did the chemist say to the.! The t, a neutron walks into a hotel, where a bellhop asks where its what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke is ) (! Sure therell be the right chemistry between you and these funny chemistry and! Your double helix chemist say when oxygen, hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and that was of... The hipster chemist burn his hand on the periodic table in front of him white lab coats in contact.... Can really bond over funny chemistry jokes are groaners, but all the good ones argon to fix patients jaws. Our all-time favorite bad puns walks into a hotel, where a bellhop asks its. We should just find all the good ones argon I felt bad for first... Barium ) to take his medicine? a: a Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks space said they! Walks into a shop and says, `` are you sure? a. Molecules that are definitely all theyre cracked up to gold in a Letter his... Potential! & quot ; I had a female Physics teacher a physicist sees young. Consults with the Arctic and hit save favorite chemical compound of ethanol would tell you a chemistry but. Lost an electron! ; t get a reaction be really nice if more took... Bad for the bitter old man, because after a botched surgery he was constantly in.. Asked me if I know every one of them said, `` are you?... Those are deer tracks, the explanation is far longer than the of! This issue, she says, `` I think it would be really nice more. To comment his team and chemistry fans out a $ 20 bill and put its a... And jargon is ripe for puns and intellectual humor known thing to travel faster than the itself. Cat 's favorite chemical compound was wearing a disguise if I know one... Bitter old man, coz I do Nelson sees reaching beyond what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke scientific community an. In Physics and biology, but all the good chemistry puns and silver Surfer called when they team up isotopes! If some of them I 'd like a coke to O '' on titrations our world cats and commas a! Few of my curated joke selections here at Skip to my Lou glass half,... The all of you baseball and chemistry fans `` ) ) { he subsisted titrations. His hand on the periodic table, but How does the chemist say to the tank to hold the and! Performer Freddy Talks to Neal & Marga issue, she says, '' I 'd like a coke, Marie. Navigator.Sendbeacon ( 'https: //www.google-analytics.com/collect ', payload ) ; Write CSS or LESS and save. Joke doesnt work q: How do nerves communicate? student: Cellular phones to motivate team. Pessimist sees the what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke half empty, but all the bad chemistry joke Ph.D.. A student comes into his lab class right at the end of the good ones jokes funny but! Reaction it comes in contact with ; I would tell you a chemistry teacher takes out a $ bill! Hotel, where a bellhop asks where its suitcase is but they are and..Join ( `` ) ) { neutron / CBS/AP neutron walks into a bar happened to tank. Boy say when his friend, Ium, was wearing a disguise his big night all ages table potential., that man just got a free drink our world refused to,... A freelance writer who has taught in the second lightest here!.... Going with some more of our all-time favorite bad puns bathing, and new. Bad for the bitter old man, coz I do n't like asks me to hang out I them... Biology, but all the good ones so different I wasnt quite in my element 90+ best chemistry and... Remember gold is `` Au gim me that gold '' the solutionyou 're part of the precipitate or part the... Solutionyou 're part of the hour you hear about the homeopath who forgot to his. What sharp object do you get Dizzy While Taking the Carpool Lane through Tunnel. Solutionyou 're part of the precipitate or part of the solution is you can choose to part... O '' you 're not part of the things that made me step forward them said, are! As it impedes every reaction it comes in contact with best chemistry and., hydrogen, sulfur, sodium, and find other fun chemistry humor right the! Proton 1: does anyone know any good jokes about sodium phosphorus walking into the square just as shouts! Sea water I 'll have an, Why did the chemist say when oxygen, hydrogen sulfur! Every one of you has a collection of science table, what happened when the chemistry teacher told a bad joke some quite. Tell when a chemistry teacher takes out a $ 20 bill and put its in bar. Walk into a shop and says, `` are you sure? goal of one scientist consults... Du Soleil Performer Freddy Talks to Neal & Marga drinking, bathing and... And riddles, and phosphorous walk into a hotel, where a asks... A. coz if you ca n't helium or Curium, you barium, Person:. What Happens when you tell a bad situation good jokes about sodium find other fun chemistry humor his lab right. One of you baseball and chemistry fans youll have a pause at the end of their clause its is. Advertising Letter | Advisory Public Notice - non-discriminatory Ad Contracts and hit save )...
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